Amelia's Shades of reflection

Hello All! Today 16/05/2020, I went to office, but heard the news that one common human resource is affected by COVID-19 and he had been to office every single day for the past 10 days.  Every one went to panic mode  for some time and some could not accept it.  My first thought was -I do  not live alone, have elderly people living with me- What should I do? So,  Though Panic is not my reaction I can say that I am worried. I know that I have to undergo 15 day observation period and do a COVID-19 test after the period if no symptoms found in the duration. Then again I was wondering if this  situation could've been avoided? By staying at home--then again would it change my future possibilities of not getting affected or least not coming in contact--the answer was no, simply because there are endless possibilities to come in contact with an affected person. So no permanently working from home is not an option. We can only take safety precautions...

1. Gratitude-Be grateful to the people who brought you to this world.Know that they will be there for you no matter what. There are million other things to be grateful for. 2.Create happiness-that should be one of the primary life purpose. 3. Carepe diem!- when you do something meditate on it. 4.Expectations-Do not expect anything that you have not worked for.Fulfill self needs. 5. In-dependency- Do not impose upon others. 6.Choices-thoughts of others give you choices, but you alone can make the decision. 7.Responsibility-from an age when you can make conscious decisions,you become your own responsibility. 8. Care-care for yourself,then care for others. 9. Create legacy 10. Help people in need-who are authentic. 11. Do not help people if they are healthy in body and mind.- if you do then you are ruining them, you can only give them props for living. 12. Values-Stick to your values. 13.Where ever you go, stick to your roots. 14.Wealth is counted not in currency, but by peo...

I question myself as have to take an important decision- what I want to do with my life? Am I doing what I want to? Sure I have a job which require me to travel and visit places now and then. Now as I contemplate and reflect upon the decisions that have made me who I am today, I ask myself again who I want to be? I never thought when I was younger this question will stupefy me. But here I am. When  was not so mature I had a robust answer which was 'A person who want to explore the world of chemicals and make things which will change the world a litter better for the people'

Memories not framed. Framed snippets of moments. Moments of life passed. Moments became collection of memories. Recollection becomes chocolate. And sometimes when one is presented a chocolate, the one returns the heart as reward. Memories become framed!! Years passed... Framed memories become feeling lost, feeling craved, feeling missed. Feelings become difficult to express. When for long ignored,unaccepted,unrecognized,refuted,fought. When one becomes fools till we realize "we can't control our heart", though it may be too late of a realization. Amelia, Carpe diem!! Live the present without leaving any regrets for the future.

Hi there! How are you? It is been long since I did one of my rant. I usually did a lot of rantings either through my write-ups or through my friends. Now a days I don't get time to write, you can say I've been carried out by the busy-mess' of my business! Time has taken a lot from my life and it has taught a lot about life. Past two years after becoming an engineer has changed me a lot. On the brighter side it has made me a strong independent women who can face the rational and emotional world without fear.It is a long journey that I've to walk alone I suppose. Many of my readers might 've understood that I'm a person who writes things without giving out my personal emotions.I write stuffs but people who know me wonder when I felt that I wrote. I act emotionally detached which has cost me so much. I wish I am not so. I've been a very personal person through out my life. I fuddle with peoples thoughts on me -rather did it deliberately-. Peop...

and here is a video............. https://www.dropbox.com/s/o83an7tmbo0g7zc/2014-02-19%2010.23.42.mp4

It is bee a long time since I rabbit on that came in this real-delusional life of mine....

Whether saying you'll never leave, or saying that I am a good person, as far as I can see you are happy. You know, you are special to me. The sight of me like this is awkward, and the plain sight of you without any dreams as well.

As I pass through a motionless crossroad with sun just about to go below the horizon on one side and almost dark the opposite side and dark hills ahead of my sight when I call upon the thoughts of you...a confession to myself; a confession with hopes.. Hoping 'coz you can be dark as sky with charms,else a rock when rubbed against would ignite fire or may be a hard stone to stumble upon but worth falling. With that thought I instantly smiled. I wonder 'll I be able to bring about the innocence in my smile like those kids playing. There is no way! But I have it now. With that thought I instantly smiled. May be 'coz you  are a hope, desire and dream yet to be actualized. May be we aren't estragned, May be we are different, or yet to be known. If it happens,then I believe there will be a day when you play by my side. Not like me, but with the note of your heart. So that I we can play by listening to each others notes. To be a perfect medley of me...

L ong time ago when I was young and VERY shy, I was at a function. The kind of event that's usually in a ballroom and there is assigned seating. Maybe a wedding, but I was alone. I remember that much. I also remember the low lighting and soft music playing. Everything that the light, from the small dim lamps, could not reach was illuminated by only a candle. The soft music matched this mood and it came from a sting quartet away at the corner. I was up walking around taking in this beautiful scene and made my way back to my table. Just before I reached to pull my chair out. A girl stopped me. I was stunned for a moment by her beauty. She asked me to dance. I was not much of a dancer, but the song that was playing was slow. So, I agreed and she pulled me by the arm through the maze of tables. We stopped at the dancing area and just looked at each other for a moment. Still stunned by her, I felt a sense of numbness. The kind where you don't know if your knees are going t...

Each step I make You come towards me your humble smile is what makes me who I am. It must be love according to me Even if I cannot reach you, It is Ok! Just as you are now,remain in the same place, forever! It must be love,as my heart is telling me so. Despite blocking my eyes,you can still be found deep in my heart. Like this I keep thinking of you, I cannot do anything more. Step by step, I am going. You too are coming to me. Your faint smile,Is for me my everything. It must be love, the feeling of mine. It must be love,although I am lacking. Even with my eyes closed,even with my eyes covered you are the love inside me. Like this, I long for you only.. Like this, I cannot do anything.. I long for even a trance of you.. Suppose your heart were to stay in place. Suppose your eyes were to light up. Even if I give my everything, I am lacking.. It is Ok, even if you cry... It is Ok, just keep smiling.... It works, that's it matters.. Come to me,and be her...

An year before I was myself, but now I have to think who I'm, it is time that I bring up the old crazy self....to be the whom I want to be....none will understand these words...as it is mystic enough to be a mystery as always!!....looking back..it was an year which made me someone I can't yet see clearly....it is indeed time to shake things of my head...to smile again,to laugh again.............that is what I really am!!..... HAPPY NEW YEAR WELCOME  2013!! HURRAY!

  It is like a bestfriend but more. It’s the one person in the world that knows you the best. That someone who makes you a better person. No, actually they don’t make you a better person. You do that by yourself because they inspire you. someone you carry with you forever. It’s one person who knew you, accepted you and believed in you before any one else would. And no matter what happens, you’ll always love them and nothing could ever change that.........whom am I talking about?

When my eyes close, I see many things I see what my future brings...'mystery'.. When my eyes close, I feel many things Sometimes the pain of heartbreak....'regrets'.. Other times enlightenment......'full of energy'.. When my eyes close, I imagine I imagine what was, would could, what is, what can be...'interpretations' When my eyes close, colors appear They take over in my mind for what seems like years....'imaginations' When my eyes open, dreams awake...'decisions'  And it’s the start to another day When my eyes close, I breathe out every dysfunctional, disturbing thought Remembering to let go of the dreamer that so often gets lost.........it is out of my control!!

 The playlist is somber and she keeps it that way because there is sadness in her she can’t quite figure. The source is a blur of a reason she can’t quite pinpoint. All she really knows is that she is sad and she’s too weak to get up from the floor to search for it like a women. Not that she needs to know it, she’s quite content of the sadness because most times it’s all she has besides emotions of anger, regret and desperation...... Lingering in this cloud of emotion is comforting, she would like to think.....She opens her eyes and realizes: she’s alive. She could live life again and that’s one sad reason to be happy.

listening to music... the words unsaid... translating it to world so unknown...but everything is so clear there...

hey hey.......u.......I waana say this The beats are slow I feel like an empty glass... Miles between us It looks like why.?......... i feel the music of our separation played... while me sitting alone....

To my Caroline, You’re probably thinking I’ve forgotten all about you by now, but that’s far from it. The promises I made  still linger my thoughts. I never really told you my fondness, and for that I really get down on my knees with all my love! I found you, so I started breathing You became the light of my darkest days It was just a matter of timings that I fell for you, 'coz you never did anything, but whatever you did was enchanting,  bringing smile on my face,  an extra beat to my heart, a rush!!  I have missed you every waking day and my heart still hurts, but I’m getting better. For you showed me the one in me that I never deciphered till I believed  in you.  I continue to smile and still go on without you.  I know I do miss you, but I have kept it all inside of me,only for me to know.  I still wonder about your doings, how you are, what you’re doing, what we used to talk about, to the laugh in your voice, just...

 Eyes Zooming in, Zooming out; Rolling liveliness in high definition, Taping and preserving moments in my mind, Until I run out of memory, The tape will roll as long as I breathe, As I blink the snapshots fill by veins, With pleasing sensation I rebound, As I speak I playback what I hear, although I enjoy translating it into my own words at times, So until I stop breathing, and the film blacks out, I’ll live this movie of a life, and play it back to myself…

Glimpse of eyes, inscribed in heart forever, Timeless Passage from time unknown to time endless, Understanding the Lines unsaid, Cherished with a smile, Feeling lasting forevermore....